being twenty, you're NOT a teen anymore....

hi!

Good week so far. Except for the homeless dude we have yet to see, plus me being put on the first grade boys team. twice. (yesterday and tomorrow, it's midnight).

My boss has only snipped at me I think twice this week. The rest of the time, she's been really nice to me. It's weird....

However, I have decided to not go into full time ministry; it's not for me, but at least I know where God doesn't want me to be.

I'm going through a rough and hard decision right now: Since I didn't do well in English and math, my parents only want me to take English and Math Fall and Spring but I'm embarrassed because people pester me and it's hard not to lie. I'm also scared to tell Ben because he's really smart. In his major, you have to keep a 3.o every semester.


I know I'm not stupid, but I learn differently and I tend not to do the work but I have every intention in doing so. I know it's dumb to think of other people's opinion, but my Mom is right: God isn't going to ask me on my degree but on what I did for Him, which I lead a child to Christ! Now the Angels rejoice! :D


So, my parents and sister know but I'm not sure what to tell my friends....? My close ones anyway....that I suck at math? That I am not the greatest writer? That it's going to take longer to get an associate than what I thought it would? In the eyes of the world, I am a failure, somebody with a disability, somebody going to be left behind in the dust.....how do people do it without God? I don't know.


But on a brighter note, I'm going to a camp (non job related) which is my vacation, then I'm going to go see a Christian musical, then the beach! I'm excited for those things to happen...never been to the beach before...so it'll be nice to get rid of my worries next week. Away from work, boss, and big life decisions. Just working for the LORD, doing projects. I guess I'm better with physical than speech related work, LOL.

I want to do what's best for me. I want to become a paralegal. A definite thing in my life, just don't know how to get there.

Well, goodnight! Faith.